I should probably find a better way to make money online than my normal "send me money for no good reason" campaign. This has worked before, oddly, but since I didn't run myself into credit card debt, it's not so successful for me.
These were my thoughts when the door flew open, and a small band of happy midgets came tromping into the living room. They wore Wendy's uniforms, and carrying spatulas in their stumpy little hands. They attacked me and tried to drag me out the door and down to the fast food joint to buy a burger.
This has happened before, you know. The previous attempts by corporate America to pull me into their stores for forced commerce had failed thanks to the exploits of my love ninja, V.
And this time, I was to be saved once again by her, but not thanks to her violent and deadly arts of Kung Fu. This time, she used her love to save me. You see, she loves midgets, and upon seeing this torrent entering the apartment, she squealed with delight. The midgets stopped and looked at her with fear in their eyes.
She built a shelter for them in the back yard tonight, and thus, she herded her newfound midget tribe into this hovel at knife-point. I asked her if she thought that the Wendy's people would be dissapointed that she'd coopted their entire tribe as pets. She just smiled and replied:
It's what Dave would have wanted.