Welcome to the Daily Gism




Hear the fabulous exploits of one complete reject



As the airport bustled around Him, He waited patiently, tap tap tapping on his tiny keyboard . Behind Him, droned the humming of CNN Headline News , no longer the Airport Edition which ceased broadcaasting a few years back. Possibility: this was one of the first signs of the coming flushout of American markets.

The national spelling bee seems to be taking place right now. An interesting aside to the slow drudgery of modern life. Watch the little children work their asses off to win the competition which eventually, will leave them out of touch with modern society. In His book, anyone who can spell that well, that reliably, and that quickly, has absolutely no chance of understanding our disturbing language in a few years.

And so, He turns his attentions to figuring out exactly what he will do to keep himself busy during the long six hour jaunt across the mainland of the US.

Headline News is interesting in the airport. It seems easier to spot the complete malarkie that comes with the Ted Turner-slant on the news. Interspersed with stories of how well off the American economy is are advertisments for the newest clap-trap from TNT studios: John Gotti's life story. He can't think of much else that would bore him more than a movie about the dead don.

Still, they do report most of the news, even if it is told with a distinct southern twang.

Now, He hears that 4 out of 10 girls in the US will become pregnant before they were 20. He knows that one is true, his own personal mate an example.

The hard Boudin sandwich cuts the roof of His mouth as He bites down on it hungrily. $8 for a feakin' sandwich. They always stab you in the face with those charges.

But none of this resolves the central question: what in the hell will He do with this daily update scheme?

For now, it seems He is content to throw all of His errant thoughts against the wall, and hope that it sticks.

What a long strange trip this will be. If they don't nab Him for the doobie in his suitcase He'll be very pleased indeed. He wonders, briefly, what exactly constitutes enough drugs to force persons in positions of power to snatch a bag off of the conveyor belt and search it top to bottom.

God this sandwich is horrid. Aside from the tough bread, it's all crap. You'd think that a company charging $8 for a sandwich would use decent ingredients. But no. It seems those at the airport are not privy to the wonderful modern accoutrements of fresh tomatoes and hydroponiccally grown lettice.



















































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