BIO Conference 2004 Shwag Awards

So the Biotech industry is under fire from hippies and green nuts about regulations and bio engineered food. Those hippies outside were just jealous cause they couldn't get inside to get their hands on the shwag! There was an amazing amount of shwag to be had at this year's BIO conference in San Francisco, and I carried back about three bags filled with the junk. It ranged from the useful, to the esoteric, to the completely baffling. Herethen, is a photographic listing of the good stuff, and the best of the best.

First, my home state of Maryland offerd a bunch of cool doodads, the best of which was this note holder. There were a number of these at the conference, of varrying sizes and colors, but this was my favorite, simply because it was from Maryland. They're very cool; they open slowly and automatically thanks to a spring mechanism.
Japan was out in full force, and they were boxing up their stuff and leaving before the teamsters could arrive and bitch about them doing their own lifting. Interestingly, the Japanese area was low cceilinged, while the rest of the conference had rather tall ceilings. They offered Chopsticks. Nearby the Japanese area was Senninger Powers, a law firm that gave out these box thingies.
The one thing everyone definitely left with were pins. They were all over, and mostly came in the state or country flag variety. I couldn't get my hands on the two most covetted (for me anyway); the Maryland flag and the US flag next to the Irish flag. Damn Micks snatched em up, I guess. The winner of this category is Australia, because they had a bunch of Kangaroo pins that were very cool, and had no branding on them. Special note to those who made flashing pins, like Georgia and Quebec.
Speaking of Quebec, this wonderful French filled province offered up these incredibly cool binoculars. Hands down the most useful item offered.
If one were obsessive, one could easily have filled an entire backpack with pens. Most were cheap and colorful, but a few places offered some truly unique writing impliments. Three winners here: St. Jude Children's Research Hospital offered a balancing silver pen, while Saxony gave out squishy liquid filled pens. These were cool, but the name tag inside the liquid is impossible to read. Finally, hats off to THT for the stapler.
Yo-yos were popular, and by the end of Wednesday, everyone was yo-yoing on the floor. Of the two I found, Cell Genesis' red yo-yo lit up when you used it, while Edwards & Angell's blue yo-yo came with a terrific metal tin, and had exemplary yo-yo action.
Squishies are always popular. These little furry guys were colorful, but pointless. Their tags offered Customized Antibodies and Scotish Biotech. Winner of the squishies category goes to Antisoma. What exactly is this blue thing? Update Peter Orosz writes "it's an antibody molecule, also known as an immunoglobulin. the B-cells of the immune system make these in large numbers to kill bacteria. there are tens of millions of possible configurations of the basic Y-shaped design: each one is made to kill a specific bacterium." Thanks Pete!
The biggest theme of this conference was the search for a cure for obesity. And yet, every single fucking booth offered up free candy, chocolate, and cheeses. Here are the mints, and some coasters. The fish wins.
Codexis gave away this pseudo hour glass sand toy thingie. It's completely unique and deserves its own little award for innovation.
Keychains were very popular, and ranged from the cheap to the shiny and expensive. This frog is easily the winner.
About two years ago, I spent $10.00 at Fry's to buy a crappy LED flashlight thingie. Today, I got the exact same one for free. Winner of the light category is the paper box light from NIAID. Your tax dollars at work, folks.
The "What the Fuck" category was quite large. There were a lot of things offered that really had no use, or no relation to the real world. The winner here was very difficult to choose. There were metal stamped bookmarks from Korea, a slip of wood with an ornate design from Malaysia, A long paper holder grabber show-er from Oisuka, bags of foul smelling stuff from Taiwan, a miniature Man Who Pees from Belgium, and two unidentifiable objects which shall be discussed next. The winner is the Belgian Man Who Pees.
OK, what are these? One looks like a breast implant with a strap on it. It's from Debio. The other is from McKesson, and I haven't the foggiest idea what it is. At first, I thought it was that thing they use to break bruises on boxers' faces, then I thought it was a paper weight. But now, I really can't tell. Update It's a magnet. A very weak magnet. The South Carolina magnet/clip puts this crappy and almost ineffectual magnet to shame.
Now we're reaching the top of the plateau. Here we have a magnetic sculpture thingie with A's, B's, and +'s. That's from Alston + Bird. There's also a tiny radio from Frederick County Maryland. I turned it on and it was already tuned to NPR which made me very happy. It's a good thing this radio is so cool, because Frederick is a shithole. Also here are a candle and some curved playing cards.
The French had the worst shwag to floorspace ratio of anyone at the show. All they had to offer were crappy mousepads and some pencils. Yet they took up about four rows of booth space. They were put to shame by the Brits, the Germans, and the Dutch, who gave out little wooden shoes. I couldn't find any shoes. They went fast. To show the contrast, here is a Taiwanese mousepad. It's one of those kind with juice and sparkle inside. And the Taiwanese pad has proper English on it, unlike the odd-ball French one, with the walrus. Also, here is the Korean post-it note thingie and some paper products from other booths.
Finally, the grand prize for shwag goes to Chiltern. This is an inflatable exercise ball with their logo on it. It's totally fun, but there are some problems. For one thing, it's super sticky and gross. For another, it's a pain to inflate. It is now fully inflated, and covered in all the gunk that was on my carpet. It's a great lint remover!